A Poem By Me

**when i wrote this poem, I think I was up for 24 hours with my bff William ... and something hit me, that made me mad. My life is full of people who disappointment, which is where the inspiration for this poem came from. It had nothing to do with my bff, it was other dudes whom have been in and out of my life. And I had to explain it in some kind of way to my bff. And then I fell asleep once I was done with it, while scooby doo was on TV. (my memory can be a lil vivid so I remember exactly what I was doing when I wrote this poem). It's the last poem I ever wrote**

Untitled || August 24, 2008

Build me up shake me down

Do all these things without making a sound

By now I should be use to this

It comes in many forms with so many twists

I anticipate this ever present disappointment

And you do it for the enjoyment

Play these games with my mind

As I begin to pressure you for an answer knowing you will decline

Fragile am I but I just don't show it

Bite my tongue a bit so you just can't know it

Thoughts and feelings kept close

As I increasingly tip-toe

Around this reoccurring issue

That I refuse to review or at least not share it with you

Cause I would rather leave things be

Or maybe I'm just clumsy

Since I always seem to fall head first into this trap

Now I have to deal with this stuff cause I'm a gullible sap

Its hard to stay focused when nothing seems to make sense

Especially when I decided not to add in my two cents

I can't escape the disappointment so it seems

The shit stalks me and follows me into my dreams

So I ask what good is a promise

When you know you can't keep a promise

It only burns bright for a short time before exploding into flames

I mean it happened so much I can't even name names

Of all the perpetrators because they all can't be counted on one hand

And at different times each of them swiped the kickstand

From beneath me and my foundation

Start to crumble causing invisible devastation

So here I am in its wake pulling the pieces back together

Checking the news for the weather

As I build myself back up within these fragile walls

Again, made of toilet paper, tooth picks, gum, and hope, that could also fall

At any minute

And just when I thought it wouldn't happen again, here you come for another visit



---I'm definitely not a avid poet, i usually stick with fiction writing.